aspirations.

For a good few years now, I've wanted to be a writer. You know when someone asks you, "So, what do you want to do?" (usually with when you grow up on the end). I used to say, "I want to be a writer." And they'd usually go, "Oh, like an author?" and I'd shrug and say, "Maybe. Maybe in newspapers, maybe in magazines. Maybe books." Somewhere along the line, this became a serious aspiration to become a journalist. So when people asked, I'd say, "I want to be a journalist." And they'd go, "Oh! You want to be on the news?" and I'd shake my head and say, "I don't want to be on the news. I don't want people to see me. I want people to read my words." This changed to writing books, novels, and when they'd ask I'd say "novelist".

But I've come to realise I am not such a good writer. And it's weird. I wouldn't say I was a bad writer, as such. I can write. It's just that, sometimes, my words don't come out write. It's like permanent writer's block. I can never portray my thoughts in just the right way.

And so I'm faced with the question, How do I be a writer if I can't express my thoughts in words?

And the answer: I don't know.